Fergus Bisset: Nobody said golf was fair

Golf hurts, golf scars, golf wounds and marks

Golf can be cruel and unfair at times (at most times in fact). You frequently give everything you have for three and a half hours and walk off the course with nothing. Every round starts full of hope and potential but, invariably, your dreams are left somewhere on the links - ripped to shreds on a gorse bush or buried in a bunker.

Sorry for all this doom and gloom, but I’m feeling seriously disenchanted with the game this morning after another upsetting Medal round yesterday. I played reasonably well but finished poorly with two bogeys in the last three holes. I ended up with a 72 (nett 70). CSS was 68 so I missed the buffer by one shot…. AGAIN…. That’s now four times in the last five rounds I’ve done that. Had I not holed a miraculous birdie putt on the 18th green last week it would’ve been five out of five.

I hate to be a whinge – That’s actually a lie. I love to be a whinge – but I have a grievance with the handicap system that I must air:

I’ve played four rounds of 72, 71, 72 and 72 and my handicap has gone up by 0.1 for each of them, it’s risen by 0.4 from 1.6 to 2.0. Had I scored 95, 98, 70, 86 it would have gone up by just 0.3. I would have scored 62 shots more over the course of the four rounds but my handicap would have fared better – that doesn’t seem right.

I think there should be some sort of automatic review of handicaps at the end of each month. Such a review would reveal that my worst nett score for July is one over par but that my handicap has gone up by 0.4 in that period. Flashing lights and sirens would be triggered and my handicap automatically reduced accordingly.

I know the committee can decide to reduce a handicap for “general play” but this tends to be applied to the bandit who protects a high handicap and wins all the club knockout competitions. I could probably ask the secretary for a “general play” reduction but I don’t think I’d get very far.

The reason this concerns me so much is this: My principal golfing objective is to lower my handicap. I’m never going to play for Scotland and I’m not interested in picking up prizes. I merely want to see how good I can be at the sport and, for me, it’s my handicap that measures this. This season I’ve gone up from 1.1 to 2.0 and it’s making me depressed. I know what you’re thinking – “Fergus, it’s pretty straightforward. You just have to play a couple of shots better next round.” I’m trying. Believe me, I’m trying.

This Saturday I’ll be giving it everything again for three and a half hours. I’ll have stitched my dreams back together and they’ll be there with me on the first tee at 1.38. I’m going to throw caution to the wind – I’m either going to shoot a 65 or an 85. If I’m to go up by 0.1 again I might as well do it in style.

Fergus Bisset
Contributing Editor

Fergus is Golf Monthly's resident expert on the history of the game and has written extensively on that subject. He is a golf obsessive and 1-handicapper. Growing up in the North East of Scotland, golf runs through his veins and his passion for the sport was bolstered during his time at St Andrews university studying history. He went on to earn a post graduate diploma from the London School of Journalism. Fergus has worked for Golf Monthly since 2004 and has written two books on the game; "Great Golf Debates" together with Jezz Ellwood of Golf Monthly and the history section of "The Ultimate Golf Book" together with Neil Tappin , also of Golf Monthly. 

Fergus once shanked a ball from just over Granny Clark's Wynd on the 18th of the Old Course that struck the St Andrews Golf Club and rebounded into the Valley of Sin, from where he saved par. Who says there's no golfing god?